This Is What Depression Actually Feels Like
Lately, I've had many conversations with people about what depression is like. Those who haven't gone through it find it very difficult to understand how it actually feels, and they struggle to figure out how to help a loved one who's suffering from it. Let me say it outright: It's very difficult to help someone with depression. So if you're giving yourself a hard time because you don't know how to support someone, give yourself some love instead. It takes time.
The best way I've found to describe what depression feels like is through a metaphor: It's like eating something and not being able to taste it (sometimes literally), or like looking at a colourful image and not being able to see the colours. You know the flavours and colours are there... but you just can't taste or see them.
But today I was looking through my files and I found a text I wrote years ago when I was starting to come out of a depression. So I thought of sharing it to help people understand it a bit better, to let those affected by it know they are not alone, and to remind them there is hope. I promise it can get better.
(Bear in mind this is my own personal vision of it. This is how I've experienced it, but it can look different for others).
Looking at depression through the eyes of the depressed:
And the days pass but you live in a world where time and space are meaningless. There's just a bleak void where you sit alone wondering if it's permanent. But if you manage to take a step outside you may be able to look forward. And if you stay out of the void long enough you'll be able to look back and see the darkness you left behind. And perhaps you'll miss the strange comfort the old numbness provided, but a part of you will not want to fall in the hole again. And you'll know there's hope, and you'll know you're worthy, and you'll know you don't deserve the burden that you've carried for so long.